Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
