Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Randomize
