Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
