I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
