Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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