Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I need to align my fucking chakras
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
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