I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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