Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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