mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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