The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize