her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize