ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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