a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
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