took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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