I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize