I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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