I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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