Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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