so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize