I accidentally had phone sex last night
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize