Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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