I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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