It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
