we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
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She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
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I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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