i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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