Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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