It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize