i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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