my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
