Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Your cock deserves a montage
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
