He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
