I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have grass duct taped all over my body
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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