Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
