Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize