have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
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