Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.