I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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