but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
