my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
