Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Randomize
