that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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