think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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