Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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