Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
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