I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
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