Your tits are I can't wait for
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
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