the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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