I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
