3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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