I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Randomize