help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
